男人,我想对你说…

写在前面:前几日,Andy已经评论了Tony Porter在TEDWomen的演讲。做为女性,我也谈谈自己的看法:),欢迎大家热烈讨论!

  在TEDwomen上,有各种各样的话题,有如钢琴上不同的琴键,Tony Porter这一位男士的出场就像是深沉的低音。他登上这个讲台,说出了对男同胞的心里话,也让思想的余音久久回荡在听众心中。

  五百年前,莎士比亚借着《哈姆雷特》说“弱者,你的名字是女人!”时代的车轮碾至今日,女性,若是稍一笼统地来看,依然不免会被贴上诸如“软弱”、“从属”、“情绪化”一类的标签;而男性则是“强壮”、“英勇”、“主导”的代名词。潜因默化中大男子主义占了上风,不由认为男性是优势性别,而女性则或多或少地是男性的附属。不禁想到叔本华竟然也是这种说法的拥护者,他在《论女人》中写道:“虽然每一个女人都处于完全独立的非自然的地位,但一结了婚,就要依附于某个男人,受他的支配,为他所统治。从这个角度看,女人的天性就是服从。女人就是要求被主宰:年轻时,主宰是情人,年老时,主宰就是牧师了。”
  做为女性,听到不免有些心寒,还好周国平以一种欣赏的眼光为女性扳回了一局,他说,“文明已经把我们同自然隔离开来,幸亏我们还有女人,女人是我们与自然之间的最后纽带。男人抽象而明晰,女人具体而混沌。”但就算是这话,听上去也是宝玉之类“男人是泥做的,女人是水做的”那般糊涂怜爱的意味。
  
  不得不承认的是,“大男子”依然占据着社会的主流观点。做为男人就要有做男人的样子,不能哭不能有情绪不能示弱更不能胆怯,我一直认为这种酿在心里的想法就是“问题”的起源,自然的感情不得释放,于是男性借着酒精借着性来渲泄,家庭暴力也随时上演,甚至逐渐地把它认为是“男人”的标志。 Tony认为这是男人给女人带来的伤害,但何尝不是男人自己的伤口呢?男人是问题的根源,同时也是它的解药。Tony在这篇TED中提出了对了同性的几点建议:尊重女性、平等待人、放开情感。
  于是我相信,女人既然是问题的受害者,也不妨做一回解决者。这个世界是互相联系着的,中医强调全局思考,男性的单方的行动显然是不够的。女性要的不仅仅是来自男性怜悯的尊重,女性要的是对方真心的平等的尊重,那首先要开始自己尊重自己,承认自己,接受自己,相仿自己,不作践自己,好好爱自己,用知识与修养武装自己,然后骄傲地昂起你的头,向这个世界挑战。当那一刻来临时,我相信“男女问题”就化为乌有了。

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《男人,我想对你说…》有5个想法

  1. 于是我相信,女人既然是问题的受害者,也不妨做一回解决者。这个世界是互相联系着的,中医强调全局思考,男性的单方的行动显然是不够的。女性要的不仅仅是来自男性怜悯的尊重,女性要的是对方真心的平等的尊重,那首先要开始自己尊重自己,承认自己,接受自己,相仿自己,不作践自己,好好爱自己,用知识与修养武装自己,然后骄傲地昂起你的头,向这个世界挑战。当那一刻来临时,我相信“男女问题”就化为乌有了

    事实上,这段改成性向问题、世人对于佛教的误解问题等都可以。有时候,我真纳闷为什么我们总是设置这么多限制,限制自己也限制别人啊。 JO from douban http://www.douban.com/people/2…/

  2. 又看了一遍,想起来张越在多年前的三八晚会上说过,类似于

    如果有一个女人不能自由的外出工作,那么就有一个男人不得不承担养家的责任。

  3. Well I love this video I have to say! “we've been having sex since we were two there aint really a first time”? lol/// about women issue, I'd probably say this is more than a stereotype thing. Man-woman issue? Never got me as a problem of fighting for equality. An absolute one coz we are made different. We were gifted with so many things that man can never experience, no matter take em as a blessing or cursing. Crying is not a privilege for women but it seems to me that when we cry in front of the man that love you, it means an absolutely at least an upset moment for them. I'd cherish that personally. I'm not saying that women are supposed to be the weak ones but hey, thats why we are named differently. If everything ever get definitely EQUAL, then why the word “women” or “female” still stand there in the mass vocabulary??

  4. Well I love this video I have to say! “we've been having sex since we were two there aint really a first time”? lol/// about women issue, I'd probably say this is more than a stereotype thing. Man-woman issue? Never got me as a problem of fighting for equality. An absolute one coz we are made different. We were gifted with so many things that man can never experience, no matter take em as a blessing or cursing. Crying is not a privilege for women but it seems to me that when we cry in front of the man that love you, it means an absolutely at least an upset moment for them. I'd cherish that personally. I'm not saying that women are supposed to be the weak ones but hey, thats why we are named differently. If everything ever get definitely EQUAL, then why the word “women” or “female” still stand there in the mass vocabulary??

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